Posted on: January 16, 2009 11:01 pm
Edited on: January 17, 2009 10:50 am

A Woman in the CBS Sport's World

During the course of this week, I had the displeasure of dealing with a less than well adjusted member who insisted on calling me, my posts and my femininity into question. Now, I’ve had a few run-ins with members before. Once, I actually got into it with 2 members who said some rather distasteful things to me. I realized how stupid it was on my part to bother arguing with ignorant people. It only got me aggravated and frustrated, so I vowed to ignore anyone who ever gave me trouble again. I’m not a member of a sports related site to get into disputes with anyone over anything other than sports.  This past week, it all started with a post I made about honor in the game of baseball. This was written as a response on the public board. 

It's too bad your not a chick for real, cuz your statement of honor is humorous like one.What's left in this or any other sport, not to be tarnished. Something as simple as stealing signs has and always will be a part of the game. OMG. Gotta be a 16 yr. old girl makin that statement. Let me teach you something on the premise you've never actually been outside before. Sports, like in life , has people who are interested in making money. This money motivates them do do whatever it takes to gain an advantage. Steroids, B. Belichick. Any of this sound familiar? Collusion. Good business. A little sneaky perhaps. Not in our law abiding society! Women really are in love with 50 yr. old ex-rockers on reality TV. Short, ugly, black-toothless dudes have always been successful with the Babes! Anyway,if you are a girl, you should probably have "The Talk", with your parents before coming back on here.If you are a girl, the ladies room is to your left on the Bosux site. That's where they spew honor untilYankees swoop in and take away X-Mas present named Teixeira. We come on here to escape the women's perspective, so you should go back to sewing.

A couple of regular posters on the Yankee board defended me which I thanked them for, but ignored the poster himself. He then proceeded to start a thread asking for proof that I was a woman, etc. Several regulars on the Yankee board again defended me. I posted one response to this sexist stating I was a woman, and I wasn’t going to let him get to me. I chose not to say anything defamatory to him because I wasn’t going to stoop to his level. I also chose not to thank my defenders on the board because I just didn’t want to get into too much about the whole thing and give the dude the satisfaction of getting the attention he desired. Let me thank the kind folk who stuck up for me now. Anyway, the guy has made some other distasteful posts directed at me and has even started in on another Yankee poster who defended me.   Here's an example.

Yes, I do feel like a man sitting here at my computer, since I am one. Thanx for confirming my point as well chargingrhino. Yankeechik must feel like she wants to be a man sitting at hers. Do you follow? I think there are way more of the Middle-Men in here than you'd expect from a YANKEE MENS BOARD!!!! We've given women everything else, why give them our sanctuary. It's freightening how many would support this. I am also aware the vast majority stay uninvolved and keep opinions on such matters to themselves. It's our PC thing we have to suffer through. So I'll assume most in here are on board with me. Yankchik I would'nt ask u a direct question because u don't really exist. As far as the get a life bullshit- Who comes on sports sites and pretends to be another gender? Gimme a small break? Rhino- I'll just assume your someones Bitch Too!! Still don't know what I'm referring to. This can't be a girl, no matter the Crap Support!!!

I don’t care if he continues, his problem, not mine.  I chose to do a blog item on this partly as a chance to say thank you to my fellow Yankee fans who are regular posters on the Yankee board. I appreciate that the majority of you don’t subscribe to this person’s beliefs and subsequent tactics. The other reason I chose to write this was to set the record straight. Contrary to this idiot’s opinion, I am a woman and proud of it. I’m actually a pretty feminine woman at that. I like to look my best when I go to work or out. I like to wear skirts and makeup. I also happen to like sports, baseball specifically. Because I’m a fairly intelligent person, I tend to speak intelligently about anything I know well, fancy that. I could use a picture of myself as an avatar to prove myself, but why should I have to.  While I respect other female posters on here in their choice to have their pictures as avatars, I chose not to do that because I’m here to talk sports, and I feel a picture of myself would distract from me being able to do that. Yeah, I’m fairly attractive, and judging from some of the incidents I’ve heard about on here, I’m guessing a picture of myself might be taken as an invitation.   It surprises me when men can’t understand why women bother with sports. We’re actually the more competitive of the 2 genders, so why is it so hard to believe? Let us be please. We’re entitled to talk about whatever we want just like men.   
Category: MLB
Tags: Baseball, CBS, Men, Women
Posted on: January 4, 2009 1:22 am

A Woman in a Man's World

I’ve come out of hibernation to write a blog item that presents 2 dilemmas that I’m sure are common in the world today. One is a woman working in a man’s world, and the other is coping with interest in a man you can’t have who you also happen to see everyday on the job. My friend, who I’ll call Jill, is presented with both these dilemmas, and as it turns out, the man she can’t have is part of the problem in the man’s world too.

Jill works for a large company at a relatively high level position. She got hired about 2 years ago based on an impressive resume with years of experience and also favorable recommendations. After a short period of time, Jill’s talent was evident to her new employers, and when a higher level position became available, it was almost immediately offered to her.

I need to mention that Jill is an extremely determined person. I mention this because when she started with this particular company, she was somewhat overweight, but due to that determination of hers’, she gradually lost it all. With her new found figure, she had to buy a new wardrobe, and while she is conservative and tasteful when it comes to choosing clothes for work, she also prefers to be feminine. Nothing wrong with that, in my opinion. I personally don’t think a woman should have to sacrifice being a woman in a male dominated workplace. Anyway, she’s turning a few heads in the skirts she chooses to wear, plus, she’s an attractive woman. I’m comfortable enough with my feminity to say that, lol. She’s not complaining, mind you, because she takes the looks as compliments.

One of the heads she’s turning is a man who’s in a higher position than her. She had some dealings with him at her former position, but now their offices are not only in the same building, but on the same floor. Because he pays her this extra attention, he’s handsome, and he’s just an all-around nice guy, Jill has developed a bit of a crush on him. She’ll never do anything about it because he’s married, but she feels very awkward around him which effects their interactions. So, how does a woman or a man for that matter, handle feelings for a person they can’t have when they have dealings with them almost everyday? I’m sure it happens all the time. On a side note, he doesn’t wear his wedding ring, and I’m curious as to why some men do that. Is it because they don’t want other women to know they’re married? Is it because they don’t like being married? I just don’t get it, but I’m sure there are men on this site who can answer the question.

Now, here’s the other part of the problem with this particular man. If Jill didn’t have this crush on him, she might conclude his looks were a bit lecherous. He purposely walks a little bit behind her to see the view from back there. He’s removed himself from behind someone to watch her walk up stairs. She’s felt a presence directly behind her, and when she turned around, it was him giving her the once over. She basically ignores it because she feels uncomfortable acknowledging it in any way.

As a professional woman myself, I’m always flattered by the looks I get from men I work with or whoever. I’ve also always been of the mind that flirting is fun, and what’s the harm in stroking a man’s ego a little. In fact, because I know my talent speaks for itself, I’m not afraid to help my cause with a little bit of that harmless flirting. There are women, and men too, whose talent is limited and use their charm and looks to get ahead though, so it’s a slippery slope. Should a woman like Jill not wear becoming clothes at work, so everyone will only focus on her talent? Should she be afraid to acknowledge the attention due to the appearance of impropriety? Hopefully, I haven’t lost my readership, and this blog item will evoke some thoughtful discussion.

Category: General
Tags: Job, Men, Women
Posted on: May 2, 2008 5:09 pm
Edited on: May 2, 2008 6:19 pm

'He's Just Not That Into You'

I remember hearing that said for the very first time on an episode of Sex and the City.  Carrie was introducing her new boyfriend, Jack Berger, to Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte for the first time.  The girls are discussing their love lives at some bar while Jack listens.  Miranda tells about a recent date where she invited the guy upstairs, but he declined saying he had to be up really early.  He kissed her twice and said he'd call her.  Jack bluntly utters his opinion, "he's just not that into you."  The girls argue with him about push/pull, guys are afraid of rejection too, yadda, yadda, yadda.  Jack reveals the secret to men is that there is no secret.  If they're interested, they say so by going upstairs and booking the next date. 

I'm all for Jack's assessment of a guy's behavior on a date, but what about 10 or however many dates down the road when the guy loses interest?  How about when they end a full blown relationship that's lasted months or maybe even years?  Why is it that one day "he's into you" and the next day, "he's not that into you?"  Now, I've been through my share of breakups, and I'll admit that after the initial shock wore off, I could objectively look back on most of them and see that there were warning signs.  I just didn't want to see them.  I'm sure there are many other women who've been through the same thing.  All of a sudden, he's really busy and preoccupied.  He's moody.  He cancels dates you have planned.  You just think your relationship is on such solid ground it's impossible it could be anything more than what he's saying.  But it is.  So, why, if it's so simple with guys, don't they just come out and say it?  Yes, it's going to hurt the girl, and yes, she may cry, but you're a man aren't you?  So be one. 

I have also been through breakups where after that initial shock wore off, I could objectively say there was no forewarning.  These are the really perplexing guys and situations.  You're going along, talking all the time, getting closer and closer which leads you to believe he really likes you and then boom, nothing.   I've always thought it was because the guy got scared.  He's not ready for anything more serious with her or anyone, and he wakes up one day with the realization he's been getting close to a girl.  Well, that just can't happen.  So, what would be so terrible about telling the girl you like her, but you feel things are getting too serious, and it's not the right time for you?  My, honesty, what a novel thought.  It beats playing the games both genders play.  Hmmmm.....how many days should I wait to call?  How about as many as you want instead of as many as is necessary to throw her or him off.  Why can't everyone just say and do what they want?

It is true that men are from Mars and women are from Venus.  The most notable difference to me is how women like to talk things out, and men can't be bothered.  I'm not criticizing men for that because I envy their ability to let things go.  A lot of the time, women just can't.  We need some sort of explanation for why things happened, some sort of that annoying word, closure.  As we mature, we realize it's just not worth the agita to chase down a reason, but doesn't mean we don't wonder from time to time.  Men letting things go makes them adverse to facing the girl of the moment when they want to end things.  Hey, both sexes know each other to a certain extent, and all a guy can think of is how he doesn't want to deal with a crying chick.   Isn't that why they ease their way out hoping she'll either figure it out herself or break up with him?  I think so.  Why can't we all be reasonable and accept our differences by meeting each other halfway.  Hey, I promise not to freak out if you promise not to be a chicken. 

Category: General
Posted on: February 14, 2008 12:15 am
Edited on: February 14, 2008 12:17 am

V-Day = D-Day

Love and relationships can be sport too.

I had been dating this guy for a little while. We hadn’t talked about exclusivity, but it was obvious it was headed in that direction because the amount of time we spent together was increasing. I really liked him, but hadn’t slept with him yet. I admit I was dying to, but I wanted to be sure he and I were on the same page. I figured Valentine’s Day would tell it all. He showed up at my door in a suit with roses and chocolates. He took me to a really nice dinner. These are not the actions of a guy who isn’t sincere about his feelings. He got lucky that night, my gift to him, lol. There was lingerie to go with it too.

Men, let me tell you, V-Day is D-Day in any kind of relationship you’re in. I realize it’s a marketing excuse holiday, but it exists none the same. Women are just waiting to see what you’re going to do.

If you’re married, you better not forget, or else you’re in the doghouse. I’m sure the married men on here can attest. If you do forget, you’re basically telling your wife you take her for granted. It’s not important to you to remember times when you’re supposed to be romantic. She will never let you forget it either. You know I’m right. Us women are brutal. Besides, keeping the romance alive is essential in any relationship otherwise it’s likely to fizzle. I’m sorry guys, it’s true. You’re just going to have to bite the bullet and pull some romance out of your hat even if you don’t like it.

If you’re in a relationship, it’s your chance to show your girlfriend how you really feel. If you do it right, the rewards are endless, if you know what I mean. By the same token, it’s also an opportunity to end a relationship because no rational woman is going to think the guy she’s dating is serious if he blows off Valentine’s Day. Yes, we can be rational and take the hint.

If there’s a woman you like who you haven’t had the guts to approach, well, here’s your opportunity. It’s National Love Day. Take full advantage.

Has your significant other told you she doesn’t want you to do anything? Don’t fall for it! It’s a test! Seriously, women do this sometimes. I don’t, but I’ve seen it happen. She seems cool and talks about how Valentine’s Day is so commercial, and how she hates it. It’s a trap because as soon as she sees all the other women with flowers, etc., she’s wondering if she’s going to get any. All of a sudden she has selective amnesia and forgets she told you to forget it. You show up with nothing, she pouts. You ask her what’s wrong, and she won’t tell you. Sound familiar? You start guessing and Valentine’s Day comes up. “But you told me not to do anything, honey?” “And you believed me????” In life in general, it’s best to follow the motto, better safe than sorry.

As much as the rational side of me knows Valentine’s Day is just a gimmick, I can’t help but want to be a part of it. Any female who says she doesn’t is lying, even if it’s a tiny, tiny piece of her not visible to the eye. Show the women in your life you’re up to the challenge and romance is not dead. Let me add you get points for creativity. Anyone can make a reservation and buy some flowers. I believe the best romantic gesture doesn’t have to cost any money. Spending money is too easy. Thought takes time and effort and shows her how much you care. The best gift I ever got from a guy was a song he wrote for me.

D-Day has come, men! I admit we can be difficult at times, but we’re worth it, so don’t blow it. If you need any advice, feel free. I wish you much luck!

Category: General
The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of CBS Sports or CBSSports.com